I woke up this morning after a great night of duty.. (no calls) and got to learn a lot my duty partner PL.
A couple of things are flowing my mind this morning.. mostly i am thinking about tomorrow.. I have a CAPS meeting at 10am, Educational Main Street tour at 12:45, MRA interview at 3pm, and then Robot Prom tomorrow night at some time..
I am in Stress and Stress Management.. We are learning about energy and the transfers of energy.. This is so cool... i think i am about my transfer of energy. I need to find a way to regulate my intake of energy.. I really think I am like a sponge.. i have to regulate my energy lol...
well i would like to put on the record that we just spent a good amount of time talking about the lines at commons.. and it jumped to the food services on campuses putting laxative in our food lol...
okay now we are talking about the Gerber Model of energy and i think it is so cool.. i am learning a lot about the things that i do but are too scared to tell a lot of people.. because they are going to think i am weird or some other kind of label. . Why do i care about what people and the way they think of me i should just come out and ask for some type of explanation as to why i am like a sponge and some other experiences that i have done.. taking on others pain to my own ie. my sister the last weekend i saw her... she had a headache and i took her headache away and transfered it to myself. that was the last connection that i had with my sister.. i have not felt the same way since... I have felt like there is a missing whole in my stomach and hear...
Page 8 number 4 thats the homework..
lol.. i am thinking a lot about me energy and the processes that i go through on a normal day to day bases... my Third Eye works a lot!! lol...
I am still figuring things out my abilities and what that means for my place in the world. In thinking about my Third Eye it has been taking a longer time for me to access the my Third Eye.. lol.
I am back and I now in Sociology of the Family ...
are we really talking about this girl that is talking about how she has never used a scrantron since high school.. no one cares just up so we can start class... we are about to start this film about aging.. its 9min and 45 secs long..
so as a gender studies major i am always examining behaviors and body languages... and as it relates to how males and females interact with their environment.. i think it is a culture thing bc he is like native Puerto Rico and he has a lot of feminine qualities.. in the way he explains things...
he is this little tiny man.. about 49 years old with a family and i just think it says a lot about comfortability.. and security.. i andmire that.. sometimes i am not secure about myself.. i try my hardest to be secure with myself and if i can not get comfortable with myself then i just say what ever and move on with my day ... sometimes by just moving on it gets me but then i say oh well.. I find myself not wanting to worry more about things more than i have to.. in the moment is not a good way to live but its the only way that i am standing and moving around .. so i guess it is working.. we were talking about defense mechanism in the last class.. and i didnt know what mine was but now i know.. i am in a state of emergency but not a natural disaster.
I think this is the most healthiest thing i have ever done.. this is a time and a place for me to talk about the thoughts that are in my head for myself with no expectations of feedback later on...
this girl is still talking and now its about substance so maybe its not that bad but her voice is so annoying...
i love his stories about his family, its really cute lol... he is a great teacher he is a lot of fun.. and sometimes its good to look at him lol...
a true reflection is a reflection that reveals the undeniable truth about oneself...
we are talking about the elderly and i thinking about Grandmother.. (my great-grandmother) and her last days... we were all there her last night and it was so sad ... but a great decision... i love Grandmother... she was the best women ever!!!!!
Okay now i am in Infant and Child Development..
And it is starting out to be a great class... first this girl is sitting in my seat.. that i have been in since the first day of class.. and then my IT is not coming to class today... WTF.. this is going to be a fun lesson.. and i prob wont be able to blog in this class because all she does is lecture and all i do it type.. so we will see how this plays out in here lol....
So i wonder if things are ever going to be different... the problem is my patterns have been altered... and now it is time to fine another pattern that will work for me..
this is like living in a new life... i feel like a fully developed baby that is trying to figure out their motor skills..
i am hungry... i really need to eat something.. my brain in not working right now.. she just asked a question and i was like huh.... so i need to pay better attention to class..
tuesdays and thursdays i can not think about my sister.. first i start off in stress and stress management and there i think about how the stress of my sister's death effects me and how to deal with it. and then i go to sociology of the family and i think about how my family has been effected by my sister's death and then its about how we are all feeling the same thing over and over... and then i go to infant and child development and i think about we were when we were children ... we were developing together at different rates but neither the less we were going through it at the same time... and now i feel like i am stuck in my development personally... so tuesdays and thursdays are really hard.. and in between these two bad days are my worst academic day... wednesday ! I hate wednesdays! and wednesday was the day that my sister passed away... so i feel like i need a change but i cant change my classes its way too late to do so.. these area ll my core classes ... so there is nothing to do..
okay on to another topic right.. so i am so hungry.. lol...
Giving our thoughts and energy to another spends our source of energy.. draining our core..
we are thinking about classical conditioning and i was thinking about last year when i got a stomach virus and then ate Penera Bread.. I can never go back there .. it was one of the worse experiences i have ever had, when it comes to being sick.. I was at health services and i was hooked up to IVs because i was so dehydrated. it was awful lol..
it is now 11:32am
I have some other things to do today .. i have Gboard in like a half an hour which is going to be log today i think... then i have to eat something then i have some RA things to do later on tonight.. I hope my parents visited my bank account bc i need some funds lol.. got to go out and go to the store lol... i also want to go out to the bar tonight and i have about 20 dollars lol..
it has only been 10 minutes and it feels like it has been 30 hours.. i have been trying to stay focused lol.. but i am so hungry lol...
now we are talking about negative punishment and i am thinking about all the times the Krissy got in trouble.. the funniest one was when she ran from my mother in her own jeep.. she had a boy in the car and my mother and step-father was in the truck and Krissy was on the move when she saw them..it was so funny to hear Mom tell that story lol... I remember the time when i got in trouble with the marks in school. and i got everything taken away from me and Krissy would let me talk on the phone when Dad wasnt home.. she was awesome.. okay now i am going to switch topics because i am starting to tear up and i dont want to in class.
I can not believe that we went down to the wire when.. we didnt even go over that much information but this chick sure can talk lol... too funny.
okay we are about to leave class, she is going over the upcoming paper.. so i am going to submit this blog now.. and make another one later on...
ttyls
xoxo
ES
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